Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hor tik kul tur ists

Sentence: When Suzy Floozie moved next door to Mona & Dick, she was always embarrassed that her yard did not look like theirs did...a cover of House & Gardens. Of course, they spent every waking moment outside weeding, watering, mowing and fertilising. They in turn found her lack of yardwork offensive. They noticed she was out all night, slept all day, not often alone and dressed scantily. They harassed and derided her at every turn and eventually attacked her. It appears that Mona & Dick were whoreticulturists and while being cuffed by the police, they shouted out "She should have been spade long ago!" and "The only Ho at work in her yard was her!" and "So much for Lawn Order!"

Etymology: Whore (hooker,streetwalker,prostitute,someone who exchanges sex for money) & Horticulturists (individuals who practice the cultivation of plants)

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COMMENTS:

Ho ,ho ho - galwaywegian, 2010-09-28: 03:19:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ay but in skee

Sentence: In our sleepy suburban town, we had an abuttinski. She was Old Lady Burns, the bitter divorcee who lived next door to us and found fault with everything people did for enjoyment. She was the Neighbourhood Witch, the one who you could never please. If we didn't mow the lawn when she felt it needed it, she called the Noxious Weed Dept. If we did start up the mower to tackle the lawn, she called the Noise Abatement Dept. If our dog was out in our fenced off back yard, she called the Humane Society. We came this close to having to toilet train Sparky on the potty inside. If we even started up the barbecue, we would have to ensure we had enough food for the whole fire crew, as she would call them the minute we opened the lid. If we cooked something spicy, like curry, the HazMat Team was forced on the scene. The police practically lived on our street because she called them for everything from suspicious persons going door to door (like the paper boy and mailman) to recording license plates of vehicles not know to dwell on our street (like all these enforcement officers' vehicles from all the various city departments)and for attempted break-ins on her property (the gas meter reader,census-takers, the Avon lady). Reasoning, bribes,acts of kindness and inclusion,threats and logical persuasion all failed to change her behaviors. She was always in the right and she had her lawyer on speed-dial to launch suit over anyone who stood up to her underhanded, second-party bullying. She would hide in her house and have every civil servant at her beck and call to do her dirty work. Being self-righteous and thinking herself an upstanding and virtuous Christian, she did speak to every religion peddlar who came to her door. Many thought it poetic justice that the horrid smell coming from her home one day was due to the fact that one of these zealots had taken exception to her smug beliefs and bashed in her cranium several weeks before and helped himself to her valuables. The police, while appearing professional, were secretly glad she no longer controlled their work duties, so they could finally concentrate on real crimes; the Fire Dept. was relieved to have an opportunity to actually fight real fires elsewhere. The moral: if you are not nice to people, there will be no one around to close your lids when your time comes!

Etymology: Abut (lie adjacent to another or share a boundary) & Buttinski(a meddler who tends to butt in)

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COMMENTS:

Good one Nosila! :)You are a great writer! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-17: 01:37:00

I was just kidding about the brevity of "hydroflobia"....This is an excellent parable and one helluva mico-novel! I hope you're in charge of refreshments at the upcoming First Annual International Verbotomixer and Wordswap Extravaganza! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-17: 03:16:00

Amdire the way you captured that butt mentality! Great etymology. Terrific word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-17: 13:54:00

Cheers, all...sadly my sister and her family had to move far away from us to escape such a neighbour...coming home was the most stressful and scary part of their day, because she spent long hours plotting fresh Hell for them. This creature outlived every elected official we had and there is finally a cease and desist response in her flagged file to warn emergency services not to respond to her calls, as she became a permanent nuisance. Of course, charging her $250 for every wasted call went a long way to curbing her behavior! It is sad that someone has nothing better to do but terrorize others...personally I think she'd give the Guantanamo guys a run for their money! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:40:00

My heart goes out to you and your sister and your families. I am so thankful that I have exceptionally good neighbors! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-18: 12:56:00

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Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: yard cell

Sentence: My neighbors were constantly gardening and telling me that I needed to do the same. I am sick of their constant yardsell.

Etymology: YARD, SELL being a play on yard sale. Also a play on hard sell. YARD - the area of land immediately surrounding a house, often covered with grass or landscaping. SELL - persuade somebody of something: to make an idea or proposal acceptable to somebody. Cell - a confining and very limiting place.

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COMMENTS:

A perfect lawn IS the sign of a sick mind. Leave the Aspen leaves where they lie. - metrohumanx, 2009-03-17: 03:12:00

Good combination of ideas. - kateinkorea, 2009-03-17: 19:51:00

Good word...as metro says, leave the Aspen leaves where they lie and you will be more Poplar! Some people just Birch and Beech all day to get attention. If they want to Spruce up your yard, they should come and do it! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:23:00

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Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: /mohn-siz/

Sentence: Charlotte pulled out of the garage to find the Christmas lights torn down to the point that they were dragging through her hair. She clawed at the string of bulbs as she nearly ran the convertible into the mailbox. Looks like the Moanses were trying to give her another hint.

Etymology: Play on words of "Joneses", as in "keeping up with the" and moan, to low with dismay or pain

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COMMENTS:

Super funny! Truly a great word for complaining neighbors. Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-17: 14:08:00

Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-17: 19:38:00

Sounds like our neighbour, Mona Lott! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:32:00

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Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: Preen-e-acks

Sentence: The Jones neighbors that lived next to Sliezanna were total "preenieacks" as they tirelessly worked hard to manicure their lawns and detailed their cars every single weekend. Sliezanna she was a "preenieack" about her appearance and she was living life to it's fullest. Yet,the Jones's next door gave her a tongue lashing about keeping her yard as nice as theirs in order to keep up the curb appeal and tax value in the neighborhood. The next thing they knew,poor little Sliezanna fainted over them telling her just how perfect she needed to be. Sliezanna recovered from her fainting and hired a lawn service and mobile car wash company to keep up appearances so the nagging neighbors would mind their own business. All is well in the neighborhood...except for that nagging old Mrs. Jones next door that cuts her eyes every time she sees Sliezanna dressed to the 9's and giggling as she waves goodbye to Mrs. Jones.

Etymology: Preen;grooming. ieacks;(slang); more than one person having a mania about their own preening,cleaning and grooming habits whether personal or objects that need grooming.

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COMMENTS:

Sliezanna! Good one! Like it! Like IT! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-17: 02:57:00

good one - galwaywegian, 2009-03-17: 05:54:00

In both your sentence and your word ... great humor! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-17: 14:35:00

Preenieactual description of amny neighbors people on this site have met! ANd I love the name Sliezanna, too! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:18:00

Thank you everyone :) I love this site and the challenges to use my creative thinking! Hugs to you all!!! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-18: 03:14:00

Creative and to the point! Thanks! - jasjamson, 2009-05-08: 02:19:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: nābôrz

Sentence: John found the people next door complete neighbores. What little personality they had is hyper-directed into lawn care. They have gone so far as to install electric fences to keep squirrels from walking on their perfectly-manicured yard. Squirrels in the trees you ask? Absolutely not! No trees! Trees are far too random in the way they grow and all that leaf dropping just won't do. Grass clipped to 5/8 inch and a few carefully-selected flowers are all they'll tolerate.

Etymology: neighbor (a person living near or next door to the speaker or person referred to) + bores (people whose talk or behavior is dull and uninteresting)

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Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: GOAD NAY bores

Sentence: My good neighbours had become goadneighbours, and now I was wishing for good fences. It all began when Mike got a promotion. He and his wife bought an SUV that they were always washing, waxing, and admiring while they took pictures of each other standing by it. They landscaped their yard, put in a pool, and built a sundeck. But everything was for show and pictures, and now the rest of us neighbours were tired of them harassing us. Suddenly our yards weren’t good enough, our houses needed painting and we were bringing down the neighbourhood. Any more goadneigbourly advice on how to take care of my weeds on my lawn or the cracks in my driveway, and I might just build that fence.

Etymology: GOAD: to keep irritating or annoying someone until they react GOOD NEIGHBOURS

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COMMENTS:

Puntastic verbotomy! So on the definition, too. Excellent! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-17: 14:37:00

You goad, Girl! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:28:00

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: hownds + keep + urs

Sentence: Morrie's neighbors were real houndskeepers. They spent their entire life grooming their yard and house so that it was a "showplace". Because Morrie did not choose to spend all of his free time in the same pursuits, his neighbors continuously derided him and made snide comments about the condition of his lawn.

Etymology: hound and groundskeepers >> Hound (To urge insistently; nag) groundskeepers (Groundskeeping is the activity of tending an area of land for aesthetic or functional purposes)

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COMMENTS:

So apt to the definition. Super etymology and verbotomy! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-17: 13:59:00

I agree with silveryaspen! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-17: 20:08:00

I agree with KateinKorea! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-18: 04:51:00

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Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: twit-bores

Sentence: The Adams family were such twitbores that neighbors could not survive in order to comply with their perfectionism.

Etymology: Twit- To taunt, ridicule, or tease, especially for embarrassing mistakes or faults. Bores- a dull, repetitious, or uninteresting person, activity, or state.

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Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: hood-hawgz

Sentence: Patience had endured enough. She was exhausted from the nightly raids by her nebby neighbors, Neil and Nosy Parker. They pruned, they plowed, they picked. What deadheads! So what if her dog peed all over her lawn--it was her lawn, wasn't it? And the world needed more nitrogen! Last night was the last straw. Patience had been awakened by the sound of the duo flooding her yard with water. She stood at her window and watched in astonishment. Obviously these hoodhogs were trying to dilute the urine. Then they began to root around, scraping up the dead grass, quietly bickering over whether it should be to a depth of one-quarter or one-half inch. In the morning she had found a note on her back door saying, "Now you may sow replacement grass."

Etymology: From HOOD, slang/contraction for neighborhood + HOGS, meaning greedy or selfish, also a play on pig, derogatory for police

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COMMENTS:

No doubt distant cousins of hedgeghogs? - Mustang, 2009-03-17: 22:57:00

All that grass and not a sharp blade in sight when you need it! - Nosila, 2009-03-17: 23:29:00

Hahahaha! Good word! - metrohumanx, 2009-03-18: 04:49:00

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